Tuesday, July 8, 2008

Email From YouTube 3

This is an email from youtube:

"Hello, I just wanted to comment on your videos. I think that it is very brave for you to be open about your condition. I have a ton of second hand experience with it because my husband has agoraphobia and has been affected by it for the past 6 years. It peeked out when our second child was born. I was in the delivery room and he just took off out of the hospital and sought sanctuary in the car. I didn't get an explanation from him but rather his Mother as that is who he called to drive him home. I was confused and demanded answers for what the hell had happened. I have since had several doctors and mental health experts explain the condition to me. It has been hell on our marriage but we have worked it out when things get rough. It's hard to live with the condition when you are the one that is affected and it's hard for a significant other to deal with also. My husband is so bad that he can't handle me leaving him alone at all! Stressful to say the least but understandable if you are the one that has the condition. My pet peeve is that our friends and family say that he should just suck it up and deal with i? Hmmmm. How do you just suck it up and deal with it? If people could I am certain that they would, no person with the condition can say that they honestly enjoy it or that it benefits them in anyway. I hope that someday doctors stop passing antidepressants out like candy and focus on a real solution to such an awful condition. I wish you the best with your personal condition and have subscribed to your channel to watch your journey. Hugs"


My Reply,

Thank you for writing. I agree that it is very stressful on people who care for us. I know my bf suffers along with me. I am unable to comfortably go out to eat with him or to the movies. In fact he is from FL and the only reason why we are living in NY now is because this is where I am from. Two years into our relationship I had a very bad depression and just wanted to go home. He came with me. He has also watched me nearly drink myself to death trying to self medicate the anxiety. I am sure he is pleased that I no longer drink.

He watches the hell I go threw as well and just as baffled and angry about how I am treated by the medical community and the government agencies.

Before I go to the dentist for example he knows I am up most the night because I can't sleep from anxiety and he knows the next morning when I throw up before I go then quickly brush my teeth again and try to pull myself together.

He sees it all as I am sure you do. I don't know if your husband has the fear (I know I do) that you will leave him. I fear people I love the most leaving me because of my condition. After all he could find someone who could do all the things he wanted and with ease so why does he hang around with me? I assume he likes me for some reason hehe.

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