Wednesday, October 21, 2009

Podcast or Something

I have spent the past two days sick to my stomach. I think I have some stomach bug that has been going around. It seems to be passing though. I did live mostly on liquids during it....ahhh memories of earlier this year when I had to live on liquids for months.

The downside to being sick is I have not been able to exercise for two days and if I miss tomorrow that will be 3 days...not good. I actually miss exercising, isn't that weird? Either way if I eat enough tomorrow I will be exercising.

So, over the past few days I have been considering doing a podcast type thing...a podcast, but not a podcast. Basically, I find that many people don't read, so lots of people never get into this blog. I have videos up on youtube, but guess what? I don't really feel comfortable being on video often...it's just not my thing..at least right now. So I figure audio might be the way to go.

I will still be doing the blog and of course videos, but to be honest I have so much to say recording it might be a good idea for me.

This is my plan. I have a Vonage phone, when a voice mail is left on it, it gets emailed to me as an audio file. I think my phone allows 10 minute voice mails, so that would work out well. Then I could just upload those audio files to a second Youtube account and a free podcast company... maybe.

If of course the voice mail thing does not work out, I guess I will have to sit in my chair and record it with my computer mic which would be boring. I want to be able to move around, talk while I walk on my treadmill or while I cook.

This blog and my videos have been so honest, but I really want to make these audio recordings super honest, my thoughts on a variety of things, my spiritual ideas, foods I eat, more into my past, basically everything. The fear in doing this is I will piss people off who do not share my views or people will see me for the nutjob I really am hehe. I mean seriously I think and do messed up stuff...and for the first time I would not be censoring myself. Trust me I heavily censor myself.

I don't think at first I will even post a link to these "podcasts". I will however mention my blog and videos in the podcast leading people here, then after I see how it goes post a link on this blog to the audio files. I don't even think anyone will be able to listen to them all, because in part some of the reason I am doing this is because I have so much to say and no one in real life to tell it too, or anyone in real life who cares enough to listen to it. At least online some people see, read or hear some of it or at least enough to understand. Though I must admit I find it frustrating when someone asks me a question I have already covered several times about my life, but hey it is what it is.

Someone online asked me once why I do this, meaning put my life out there like this exposing private things and thoughts. There are two answers. One is to help others not feel alone in their suffering, feelings or thoughts and the other more selfish reason is because I am here on this Earth and I want (maybe need) to be heard. Growing up I always felt I had so much to say and teach. I have had some very hard things happen in my life and I need to believe it had a purpose, that everything I have experienced and thought is meant for me to share with others. I also do not believe I will be on this Earth long (would be nice if I was wrong), so I want to say as much as possible while I still can. Maybe there is a third reason. I could be looking for the human connection that I always seek and have yet to find.

I get so many interesting emails. Most of them are from very kind people, trying to find their way in life..they share their stories and experiences with me and that is cool. Others ask questions, have suggestions (some of which they might wonder why I don't take ..trust me I have my reasons.) and some emails are from completely loony, out there people who scare me a little, but an amusing kind of scary.

Well anyway that is the ideas I am toying around with right now. I will be sure to update you with how it goes.

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