Thursday, June 11, 2009

True Friends

So I woke up this morning around 2:30am and signed on yahoo. I had this lovely conversation with a friend from high school that I have kept in touch with over the years. We even use to live together. I knew where the conversation was going so I just played along to see what would be said by putting a lot of "hehe's" and saying very little indepth things.

Pretty much the attack on me started out of no place because right before the first lines of the copy and paste conversation I am putting below, she was just talking about her kids and xbf from years ago. The "u have yer illness" came out of no where literally. We were not even talking about me and I was not even talking about me.

Convo:

Friend: u have yer illness
Friend: i have my kids
Brian: lol
Brian: i rather have kids
Brian: hehe
Friend: no
Friend: u dont
Brian: hehe
Friend: they wpould
Friend: be warped
Friend: fucked
Brian: yes
Brian: why warped lol
Friend: u need more
Friend: then what life can give'
Brian: hmm how do i do that
Brian: hehe
Friend: stop
Brian: stop?
Brian: hehe
Friend: thinking u have everything wrong with you
Friend: u r fine\
Brian: sorta hard to do when i keep getting dizzy spells when walking and head pressure and racing heart which I never had before
Friend: no
Brian: and when i throw up
Brian: I try to ignore it
Friend: its in yer head
Brian: not all of it
Brian: anxiety is
Friend: some of it]
Brian: the anxiety part sucks
Brian: it is like being on edge all the time which drains people who have it
Brian: and there is no reason to feel on edge people just do
Brian: its weird
Friend: you
Friend: need
Friend: help
Brian: I see a therapist
Friend: get it
Friend: not enough
Brian: and doctors
Brian: who else then hehe
Friend: i dont know
Friend: but yer fucked
Brian: thanks
Friend: yw

So I just signed off after that. There really is no point. The same person kept asking me to let them be there for me a few weeks ago and how they were sorry about my mom and what I was going through and "How come you won't let me be there for you?"

The answer to that is because I might have a lot of issues, but I can spot other unstable people who may want to be there for me or think they do, but I know they can't be. I also know that they will turn on me on a dime and that is not what I need right now. That is also not a true friend.

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

The 3 'Anonymous' say it well.
BTW-Have you considered acupressure or acupuncture?

Anonymous said...

WOW!
Un-Fucking-REAL!
What an absolute twat! 'Scuse my language- but that takes the cake.
Oh Brian. There are some of us out there who "get" you- i hope you know. Don't bother yourself with this person ever ever again if you can avoid it- seriously. I kinda feel sorry for her kids with that attitude she has there. To have such a heartless bitch for a mother.

Ya know- people like that remind me of why i don't like most people LOL.

Been meaning to drop you a line lately.. but saying hi in here for today instead.
Hope youre doing ok.
(((hugz)))

Eddie

Anonymous said...

PS- i hope she reads this
LOL

Eddie

Anonymous said...

I have to agree with the other posters about friend. She is a crude bitch and she has NO RIGHT trying to tell you what is wrong with you when she has no idea what anxiety is. Only another person who deals with anxiety can understand what that is like.

Anonymous said...

Brian,

With So-Called friends like that you don't need any enemies.
She's a mean, and self centered person. She's a BITCH!!

I just started reading your blog Brian. I ran across it looking up agorahphobia,panic attacks, and anxiety. It is a true condition. I should know, I've had it as far back as I can remember. It started happening to me when I was about seven, as far as I can remember. Thats 37 years of living with this horrible condition. I understand Brian, I also understand what it is like for others not to understand...

I would love to chat with you sometime, you have a new online friend in me.

Hang in there

BIG HUGS
I would like to chat with you in private, and i will try and IM you on yahoo..


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